tough issue 2.. is evangelization the priority of the church

following on from my last post on tough issues
(to do with 'inclusivism' - go here http://asthekingdomturns.blogspot.com/2013/10/tough-issue-1-inclusivism.html)
a concern of mine is what has been touted as the priority of the church
evangelization
   converting people by getting them to believe

i am at odds with this philosophy
here's why

the 'great commission' as it's called can be found at Matthew 28
18 Then Jesus came near and said to them, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. 19 Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

of note is the fact that Jesus didn't say to convert someone
change their beliefs
change their minds to believe things

what he did say was to make disciples of them
and that is quite different ...
beliefs are knowledge-oriented
they are mind-driven
assent to a particular set of ideas or principles

discipleship is moving in a particular direction
and following a particular person
to be just like them ...
it is adopting their lifestyle
and their philosophy of life

so there's movement
specific direction
following a specific person
fundamental adjustment to lifestyle

intellectualism falls far short of that ...
even though evangelistic-oriented people will say
   i'm being simplistic
   and they're not simply talking intellectual
   and there's more to it than that
fact is much of christianity is evidenced by it ...
people believe a certain set of things
and think that by believing those things
they are safe

selah ..~

apostle paul speaks at some length to Messiah's church
as a body
in his 1st letter to Corinth - 12.12-30

in this very important illustration of how the church is to operate
paul uses the individual parts of the human body
working in tandem
supporting each other
in synergy
so that the physical body can strengthen
function effectively
protect the vulnerable parts
etc etc

think of your own body and how you operate
paul takes this analogy to the Body of Messiah

it's a wonderful demonstration of the organism
working in synergy
to support itself  in growth

yet again he speaks in the letter to Ephesus at chapter 4
11-16  And He [Messiah Jesus] personally gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, for the training of the saints in the work of ministry, to build up the body of Christ, until we all reach unity  in the faith and in the knowledge of God’s Son, growing into a mature man with a stature measured by Christ’s fullness. 
Then we will no longer be little children, tossed by the waves and blown around by every wind of teaching, by human cunning with cleverness in the techniques of deceit. But speaking the truth in love, let us grow in every way into Him who is the head—Christ. 
From Him the whole body, fitted and knit together by every supporting ligament, promotes the growth of the body for building up itself in love by the proper working of each individual part.

look at the underlined wording
there is apostle paul's favourite theme of 'edification' or 'building up'
he points to unity
to maturity
to growing
to supporting
to growth again
to the body building up itself

there are other pertinent passages
a concordance will direct you

unfortunately more often than not
when paul mentions building up the body
people think he's referring to numbers
to multiplication ...
not so
he's speaking of maturing it
like your body matures
strengthening
like your body
supporting
caring for
like you body

point is this
the priority of the church that Messiah built
is just that ...

not evangelization
evangelization is a natural outgrowing of the maturing body ...
as people live out their disipleship
   in the home
   at school
   on the job
   at the supermarket ...
others see the truth of Jesus in them
and multiplication results

discipleship is a change of life
it involves all of me all the time
i live it
that's a disciple
not necessarily a 'believer'

and people will respond to that truth lived out in me
truth
lived out
in
me

that's my thinking on it
respond as you will

shalom

food for homeless souls ...

today i went on my first trip to the food bank
we go once a month and fill 2 carts

 this was my favourite item
THE best strawberries ever !
bar none

tough issue 1 - 'inclusivism' updated ...

so ...... .... .
i'm embarking here on a risky post
one that could engender harsh feelings and responses
may even upset a 'friendship' .. or 3
   i hope not
i intend on posting several things of like nature
not at all to be offensive
but to express myself on theological stuff
   stuff that concerns the person of God
as i walk down this road of rethinking my 'theology'

and i want you to be in on it with me
please comment as you see fit
i welcome it
i'm open

i'll make every attempt to review and edit as much as necessary
   to get the point across as clearly as possible
   = say precisely what i have in my mind ..
i may not succeed at 1st shot
cause i can't think of everything upfront
but i'll try ...

prelude and aside-but-relevant
   unless we are willing to test our 'theology'
   as in open it up to challenge
   be open to discussion
      and other points of view
   listen to others' take on it ...
   then we are of all men most arrogant
      and arrogance has no place in kingdomlife ...
      it was the original fail of lucifer
      who imagined he could be God
end prelude and aside-but-relevant

...........

topic - 'inclusivism'

point - i hate words like this, used for this purpose
a definitive word like this often gathers associations and meanings slanted one way or another
especially in theology where argumentation and conflict are rife
   and ends up engendering all sorts of negative implications
   before you even get to discuss the topic
so i'll try to define precisely what i'm talking about
and talk about it to define it

before i give the theological definition that most closely fits my thinking
   which i found at theopedia.com
   (and with whom i probably do not agree in several various areas)
i'll try to say it my way
   in a nutshell ...

a person who believes in a Creator God
   through whatever revelation they have
recognizes the divine otherness of that Creator God
and recognizes their own mortal limitations as created being
and worships Creator God from the heart
   according to the understanding they have
knows God
   albeit imperfectly
and is accepted by God
regardless of whether or not they have ever heard of Jesus
-- - -- --- ----- -- -

i'm dodging bullets ...
but that's my take on it ...

i know i know
it cuts deep into my (your ?) traditional theology
runs anti to it
but ...
i'm on this journey of rethink/reconsider/retheothink
and virtually everything is fair game

here's the

what brought me to this today
is an article i read at huffington post in their religion section
   go here ..


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/22/10-facts-global-religion_n_4117341.html?utm_hp_ref=religion

i've thought about and discussed this several times in the last couple years
so maybe it's time to put it out there

please don't diss' me upfront ..
after all .. i could be wrong ...

here's the definition according to theopedia.com
found here http://www.theopedia.com/Inclusivism
" Inclusivism posits that even though the work of Christ is the only means of salvation, it does not follow that explicit knowledge of Christ is necessary in order for one to be saved. In contrast to pluralism, inclusivism agrees with exclusivism in affirming the particularity of salvation in Jesus Christ. But unlike exclusivism, inclusivism holds that an implicit faith response to general revelation can be salvific. God expects from man a response proportional to the light given. Saving faith is not characterized so much by its cognitive content as it is by its reverent quality. "

looking at the article and map
i see a couple things

first 'christianity' is dominant
'islam' close behind

i
   and probably you
   if you are evangelical or fundementalist or calvinist/reformed
   or roman catholic or orthodox or anglican/episcopalean or whatever ...
don't really accept the statistics on 'christianity'
according to my/our theology ...

as point 3 in the article states
   'Most People Are Part Of Religious Majorities In Their Countries'
point 6
   'Christianity Is A Majority In Over 100 Countries'
point 9
   'Christianity Dominates A Majority Of The World's Regions'

i never considered that people born into a religion
   or a country defined by that religion
   are 'saved'
still don't
one can be born and reared in a 'christian' nation
   raised in a 'christian' church
   and be very anti-christ
   check history

so then
points to consider
- didn't Jesus say that to get to the Father a person has to go through him ? (John 14.6)
- there's the famous 'great commission' of Matthew 28
- apostle peter said there's no other human name by which a person can be saved (Acts 4.12)
- at Romans 10 apostle Paul talks about people calling on the name of the Lord to be saved
   and the blessedness of the feet of those who take the good news
etc etc etc

agreed
that's scripture

however please note the context
everything springs out of context

the context of Jesus' ministry was ' to the jew first '
he came to his own but they didn't receive him
but whoever received him (whether jew or non-jew) 
he gives the right to become God's children 
the promises were through israel to the world
first to his own people
   those chosen by God to represent him in the earth
then outward from there

so what was said by Jesus
and the context of romans 10 and peter in Acts
   as examples
are in the context of israel
they have to recognize Jesus as messiah
   long promised
   now on the scene
   even though he doesn't fit their preconceptions ...
there's noone else coming
he is the one

and besides that
the day of israel's privilege is over ...
following on israels' failure to be YHWH's representatives in the earth
Messiah will be a light to the gentiles too
It is not enough for you to be My Servant 
raising up the tribes of Jacob
and restoring the protected ones of Israel.
I will also make you a light for the nations,
to be My salvation to the ends of the earth. (Isaiah 49.6)

the context was promised Messiah
in each example

a more engaging contexting passage is Romans 1 and 2
   2 in particular

there the plan of God for humanity is laid out
revelation
first in the form of nature ...
the magnificence of nature reveals a divine hand
a powerful creator
and speaks powerfully of the Godhead

it's natural for a person to see in creation the obvious implication of a creator
and that the creation includes them
and that creator must be massively more powerful
infinitely more wise
 
to have accomplished it that creator must be divine

to deny this natural understanding is
   according to the author
a willful act

God speaks to the human mind through creation

further to that
there is a conscience issue
and a Law issue

israel
   as elected by God to represent him in the earth
were 'privileged' by Law
God gave them instructions on life
and worship
and sacrifice and atonement ...
all they needed to know him
and to please him
   in their context
   at that stage in history

but
he didn't leave the other nations hopeless
every person has a conscience
and God saw to it that the effect of Law given to israel
  was written on the conscience of everyone

so that when the unLawed in effect responded to Law
   through the witness of their conscience
they spoke to their own accountability
whether they obeyed the dictates of their conscience or not ...
they were guilty or innocent according to their own conscience
 
read Romans 2

a person cannot be judged according to what they don't know

israel had conscience too ...
but God formalized the rule of conscience as Law for them
to hold each one publicly accountable for the elect nature of their covenant with him
that is
   when an israelite broke Law it was clear to all israel

... ...

finally the ultimate revelation of God
the man Messiah Jesus
who came for reconciliation
for the jew
for the non-jew-gentile
for the cosmos

Hebrews 1 states it well
2 In these last days, He [God] has spoken to us by His Son. God has appointed Him heir of all things and made the universe through Him. 3 The Son is the radiance of God’s glory and the exact expression of His nature, sustaining all things by His powerful word. After making purification for sins, He sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high.

and in the context of the privilege of elect israel
apostle paul says at romans 3
21 But now, apart from the law, God’s righteousness has been revealed—attested by the Law and the Prophets 22 —that is, God’s righteousness through faith in Jesus Christ, to all who believe, since there is no distinction. 23 For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. 24 They are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.

this ultimate expression
of the person of God
the character of God
the love of God
has become our flesh
our brother
our redeemer
our salvation
our hope
our peace
our representative at God's own right hand

marvelous ...

so then
all men are left without excuse
   read Romans 3
jew and gentile-non-jew ...
every person will be held accountable
according to the revelation he personally has
   creation
   Law
   conscience
   Messiah Jesus
   the holy scriptures that speak to all of this
   the witness of the church
      the body of Messiah
   any combination
any nation
any religion
any person
all persons
all nations
all religions
throughout history

God will judge people based on the light they themselves had ...
fair
evenhanded
just

that is the God of the scriptures
expressed perfectly in Messiah Jesus

selah ..~

take that proverbial native of some far-removed land
who has never heard of Jehovah God or bible or Jesus ...
all he knows is life in the raw
   spearing his food
   building his hut-shelter
   protecting his family and village

when he goes about life
   sees the stars and the animals and the crops growing
   sees nature in its awesome beauty
he knows instinctively that someone made it all
someone far more poweful than he is

if he looks to worship that being
submitting himself as best he knows how ....
does God not accept him  ?

i quote from Romans 2 -
6 He will repay each one according to his works: 7 eternal life to those who by persistence in doing good seek glory, honor, and immortality; 8 but wrath and indignation to those who are self-seeking and disobey the truth but are obeying unrighteousness; 9 affliction and distress for every human being who does evil, first to the Jew, and also to the Greek; 10 but glory, honor, and peace for everyone who does what is good, first to the Jew, and also to the Greek. 11 There is no favoritism with God.
12 All those who sinned without the law will also perish without the law, and all those who sinned under the law will be judged by the law. 13 For the hearers of the law are not righteous before God, but the doers of the law will be declared righteous. 
14 So, when Gentiles, who do not have the law, instinctively do what the law demands, they are a law to themselves even though they do not have the law. 15 They show that the work of the law is written on their hearts. 
Their consciences confirm this. Their competing thoughts will either accuse or excuse them 16 on the day when God judges what people have kept secret, according to my gospel through Christ Jesus.

my take on apostle paul's comments here
is that a person who desires to know that divine creator being
and acts according to their conscience
will reap 'eternal life' as per v7

argument - if that's so
why then do we need to tell people about Jesus  ?
because it's the truth
the wonderful truth
because he is the full and complete revelation of God ..
want to know what God is like
look at Jesus ...
he is the defining reconciliation of God for this broken world
   a world that every person knows is wrong and bent and evil and needs fixing ...
how could you not witness to that in your life

so we are to display to the world the wonder of God's reconciliation in Jesus

but the person who never has the opportunity to know that is not without hope
because God is just and judges fairly
if you know the Law you will be judged by the Law
if you know the 'gospel' you will be judged by that
if you know by conscience you will be judged accordingly

God will not judge a person by what they don't know
   but by the light they had
   and their response to that light

that argument that " if that's so why do i need to become a christian "
   fails for 1 simple reason ...
you know ...
and if you don't yet know
by the end of this blogpost
you will
and you are held accountable for what you know ...
ipso facto your trying to be 'smart' fails ...
besides
seems you were simply looking for an excuse anyway ...
no man is excusable
not one
not
one

we are left with the 'great commission' ...
it is incumbent upon us to spread the good news
the wonderful truth that Creator God has begun the reconciliation of all things
   setting right the wrongness of our world system
he is doing it through the person of Messiah Jesus
and one day all will be reconciled
everything in the cosmos
and God will be all in all

as his children
we are his ambassadors wherever we go
messengers of the good news

our responsibility is to be light wherever we go

that does not translate into
every single person who has not known
   will forever be separated from God
at least according to my view of it

i've written enough on this for now
more later
prolly

shalom

the physical world, as we've been taught, is GROSSLY misleading

ok
i just ran across this
a friend posted on fb

but it got to me immediately
i haven't researched it in detail
so my comments may be off
but on 1st take
this is wild !
as in crazy !
and especially so in a world that roots itself in scientific accuracy

i assume there is good reasoning behind the use of the popular map of the world
referred to as the Mercator map
apparently particularly useful for navigation

" The Mercator projection increasingly inflates the sizes of regions according to their distance from the equator. This inflation results, for example, in a representation of Greenland that is larger than Africa, whereas in reality Africa is 14 times as large. "

so the issue is one of distortion
the farther from the equator
the bigger the distortion

cool
that may have been appropriate for sailors back in the day

but here's the thing
why use that map to teach a child about the world ? ? ?

look
Mercator projection


look again
the Gall-Peters projection


as i said
i need to do more research
but check this internet page from BuzzFeed
http://www.buzzfeed.com/hnigatu/19-maps-that-will-help-you-put-the-united-states-in-perspect

to get the effect of the distortion
compare Greenland (in white at top of map) to africa
and compare africa to usa ...

here are a couple other comparisons at BuzzFeed

brasil fit into the usa


china fit into the usa


most blatant comparison


i repeat
i don't accept this as fair until i've done more research

the following is from a wikipedia article on the issue (underlining is mine)
In 1989 and 1990, after some internal debate, seven North American geographic organizations adopted the following resolution,[22][33] which rejected all rectangular world maps, a category that includes both the Mercator and the Gall–Peters projections:
WHEREAS, the earth is round with a coordinate system composed entirely of circles, and
WHEREAS, flat world maps are more useful than globe maps, but flattening the globe surface necessarily greatly changes the appearance of Earth's features and coordinate systems, and
WHEREAS, world maps have a powerful and lasting effect on people's impressions of the shapes and sizes of lands and seas, their arrangement, and the nature of the coordinate system, and
WHEREAS, frequently seeing a greatly distorted map tends to make it "look right,"
THEREFORE, we strongly urge book and map publishers, the media and government agencies to cease using rectangular world maps for general purposes or artistic displays. Such maps promote serious, erroneous conceptions by severely distorting large sections of the world, by showing the round Earth as having straight edges and sharp corners, by representing most distances and direct routes incorrectly, and by portraying the circular coordinate system as a squared grid. The most widely displayed rectangular world map is the Mercator (in fact a navigational diagram devised for nautical charts), but other rectangular world maps proposed as replacements for the Mercator also display a greatly distorted image of the spherical Earth.

nuff said for now ...
wow

transitioning ...

i live on the cusp of a drastically different life
everything has changed in recent years
like the butterfly
sorta

maybe my colours aren't yet defined
and my wings weak
but i've emerged
am breathing
am moving
albeit hesitantly
unsure
but
headed for the light

again
i take on this post in hesitation
sometimes i feel like i'm being too personal
quite unlike me
but it's my blog
and i do it for several reasons
- to update my friends
- to display the gloriousness of my God
   who works in it all
- to record what God is doing and how
- to talk through stuff to my self
- to remind my self of stuff
among other things

i've made reference several times
to the fact that my theology
my theothink
is in transition

the day came where i emptied it all on the table
spread it out
and began to sift through it ...
it's a redo for me

all of it is in transition

there are issues that i'm making my self deal with
in such a way that a few years ago i would have called heretical
so be it
i don't live there anymore

issues like
- original sin
   and the doctrine that all people are born sinners
- salvation
   and what it means to be a child of God
   and a disciple of Jesus
- heaven and hell and futurelife
- inclusivism
  and must a person know who Jesus is to be 'saved'
- the Lord's Supper
   and what it is significant of
   and who is in and who is out
   and do we have the right to burden it with other stuff
- what is the church
  and the right of the church to be afforded special treatment by government
- evangelization
   and is that really the first priority of the body of Messiah
- the church's responsibility to the downtrodden and the hurting and the abused
- the fallacy that the popular version of evangelical christianity
   as displayed predmoninatly in the american church
   is the church Jesus built
- the blatant heresy of thieving church leaders
   who merchandise the gospel
   and gain their wealth at the expense of the members of messiah's body
- is the trinitarian view the only possible biblical construct
   or does binitarianism have a valid claim
- the doctrine of impeccability
   could Jesus have sinned
   or was that an impossibility
- the doctrine of the eternality of the Son
   was he eternally the Son of God
   or did he become the Son at a point in time
   (not arguing whether he was eternal, just in what form)
..........

that's a partial list that comes to mind over the 30 mins typing this

i'm just sayin'
virtually everything is up for reconsideration with me

during this blog post
a friend called and during the discussion
in the context of me being considered a heretic
mentioned the 'cardinal' doctrines
when i asked them to define those
we ran in to several that i now question

just sayin'
i cannot stop this
it is an urgent and critical part of me now
because i'm done living others' theology
i'm done

i cannot continue doing damage in the name of God

and i can't live lies anymore
i'm either in this
all of me
from the heart up
or i'll do something else entirely

life is in transition
may Creator God be glorified
in the doing of it
in the outcome
in me
as i look to see Jesus in people
and for people to see Jesus in me

blessings

shalom

post script ...

theology
   the stuff we put words to
   to help us define God
   who he is
   what he has done
   what he wants
etc
is not an exercise in intellectualism
not a definition of my religion
   my belief system ...
not for me anyway

for me
my theothink
is knowing God
it is part of who i am
and i intend to make it a major part of who i am
because i am his child
a disciple of Jesus
and i cannot live any more apart from my understanding of who God is
for it is out of that that i live
and move
and have my being

core stuff ..

we had our 2nd coregroup meet

all 6 were present

we used this meeting to each share for a few minutes our personal story

it was wild
i enjoyed every minute
each story was engaging
different
filled with wonder

waywardness
and direction
drifting
and calling
wandering
and God's making a way
and the love of God
fundamentalists
and escape
baby boomers
and hippie grandparents
drugs
and music
church
and out of church
musically inept
and musician
and the love of God
four square gospel
and roman catholic
abuse
and more abuse
trinitarianism
and binitarianism
seventh day adventist
and lutheran
pentecostal
and baptist
and the love of God
war
and peace
propaganda
and war for money
wealth
and poverty
lie to the masses
and fight the lies
homelessness
and food stamps
black and white
and greyness
and the love of God
indoctrination
and transformation
cult
and release
old theology
and redoing theology
where we were
and where we are
and the love of God

the love of God permeated everything

the grace of God lived through each story

and we take one more step in the direction of the homeless
as winter looms here
wet and coldish and wet

thanks to you Lord God
for blessings

we are here
diverse but unified
show us the way

shalom

grace in person ...

today ...

i haven't been feeling that great
this and that

i walked in to the sanctuary
and prayed for a blessing
a change of attitude

the pastor spoke from luke
and talked about Jesus' observations about the pharisee and the publican
and he warned us not to judge the pharisee too quickly ...
not to end up being hypocritical in the judging ...
a different take on it

then we held hands and verbalized things for us to hear and share
and to share with God
asking him to do something about those things

and then the pastor approached the table covered in flowers
and broke the loaf
poured the 'wine'
and said some of the most humble
humbling
uniting
gracefull words i've heard in that situation

grace poured out

i hesitate to paraphrase
but he said in part
that God wasn't the kind of person to simply theologize about grace
and talk about it ...
he became the message of grace
in Jesus
and lived and walked us ...
'course he said it much better
guess you had to be there

a humbling moment it was for me

i was honoured to break a piece
and dip it
as the 2 women holding the plate and the cup told me what they represented
as my heart swelled
as my attitude broke

i saw Jesus there today
among the 50 or so
listening
holding hands
being part of the holiness of his supper

and i was blessed

thanks to you Lord
for being there
and for doing the deed it's meant to remind us of

....................... .. . .. ...        .... .... .

perry was there again
and i listened for what he would say
last sunday i was attentive to his wisdom

his wording of things is different
and betrays an uncommonly humble wiseness

later as we shared the supper
i made it a point to pull up a chair next to him
and asked him to tell me about himself

for the next 20 or 30 minuted i heard the crux of a remarkable story
of journey
into Jesus
of military
and might
and fight
and turning fight into peace

of yoga
and that part of his journey
he has taught for several years

maybe i finally found my yoga teacher
maybe

shalom

the trials of introvert adjusting to unfamiliar ...

beginning this post thinking i might not post it
because i prolly won't say it right
because some people won't understand
because some of the people that won't understand
are some of the ones that matter the most to me
because because because ....

i have to resort to doing it this way
because i can't think of a better way to do it
and it's causing ... issues

i got this thing ....
sometimes
especially when i'm in new/unfamiliar/strange/different ............ . . .
uncomfortable ? as in outside the walls of my comfortzone ......

i tend to hunker down
shrink
get small ...
real small
as in roll myself into a ball and hide in the darkest corner i can find

this new place i'm in
is that ...
stepped out of the life i'd made and settled into
into this strangeness
again
for the ... severalth time
again ...
beenthere/donethat

it's unnerving
for me
for someone like me
cause i'm built for security/comfortable/fit in/familiar
...

i'm an introvert

that means this
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kate-bartolotta/traits-of-introverts-_b_4111006.html?utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false
it's a fairly good description
although generalized of course

so when i move into that new/unfamiliar/strange/different zone
and i hunker down
i disappear

there are private things i do
fb
email
blog
read
sit in a coffee shop and watch and listen
sit on the street and watch and listen


and then too
i  try to work against the tide of my introversion
meet new people
go new places ...
but that's a strain on me
because it's stepping out of my balled-up hunkering down
it saps me
energy runs low

point is

some of my friends and family take that wrong
or become offended
they think i'm diss'in them
because we don't talk and communicate like we used to

not so
not so

bear with me a bit
allow me the space to recover
adjust
undo my natural swing towards hiding
unroll myself from my balled up pose
and come out

i'll be back
eventually

question is ...
can you handle that?

....... .. .

some of my friends are hurting
going through hurtful things
while i'm in hiding

i wish i could help
i really really do

and there are 1 or 2 things i have to take on
one of those people is dealing with massive life issues
things that make or break you
and i had to deal with that this week
try to help
had to
no choice
glad i could

but i can't handle it all at the same time
i just can't
i'm tapped out
all resources spent focusing on my new/strange/unfamiliar... threatening space

i do mention you to God when you come to mind

....

listen
i love you
you are my friend
i wouldn't trade you for anything

i just need space for a while
to find myself here in this newness
while i feel cold and uncomfortable and out of sync and
.... my tooth hurts !

you might well 'accuse' me of being selfish ...

sorry
i really am
don't mean to be
it's just that i know what i can handle
and how much i can handle

hang in there, my friend

i'm still here
and i'll be back

pray for me
i'm here for hurting people
and i need to acclimatize as soon as i can
so i can help
i need to learn as fast as i can
get around to all the places and meet all the people involved in what i want to be involved in
   = very un-introvert stuff

and i need work

it's a stage
a trasitioning
i'll be back ...

peace

needtoshare ... walls and pickaxepens and courageous people

just have to share this ...

i was speaking to a longago friend this morning
we have not kept up with each other
and i haven't spoken to him more than 2 or 3 times in the last 10 years
and all within the last month or so

i grew up in the church back home with him
he's 14 years younger than i

he went to bible school
and came home for holidays and preached
i remember the shock i felt
the jaw-agapeness of hearing this 20yearold bible student preach an incredible sermon
with incredible understanding and massive communicatory skill

God blessed him with that ability and insight and gift
i'd look forward to hearing this young man whenever he spoke

lots of water's flowed under the whatever bridge since
and he's a mature man now

thing is
he's hitting walls in his life
walls that need tearing down
walls that are his
his walls
our walls
that wall us in
define us
   if we let them
'tear down those walls' someone said

he's hitting the walls because he's noticing his walls
they're in his face
defining him
boxing him in
and they're formidable walls
walls he can't tear down alone
   in his own strength

selah ..~

i've had this blog post in the making for a few weeks
unfinished
about suffering
and the value suffering can bring to life
if we let it

and this speaks to that

so
as is so often the case with us
he is suffering through major life issues
big stuff
lifebreaking stuff
lifedefining stuff
stuff that keeps us awake at night
dogs us
won't let us go
drains the very lifeenergy

those walls

he had to write some of it down
and in the writing
he saw the walls loom large
because he's confronting his walls
some for the first time ...
and he almost shrunk back
almost quit assailing the walls
almost looked back from his proverbial plow

but he didn't
it hurt as he wrote about his walls
recalled the walls in his past
the walls that defined his maze
that led him to these walls

it hurt

but he worked through the hurt
as he wrote ...
his mind went to his heart
and called up stuff from his heart
stuff he didn't want called up
because it hurt
stuff he had walled in

but he wrote
and he dug down
deep
recalling from his heart
upward
to his mind
through his pen
onto the paper
deliberatley written

each stroke of his pen cut
drew blood
his own blood
as he admitted his walls
confessed his walls

'break down those walls'

and he recognized himself
there behind those walls
and he knew he'd been hiding behind those walls
all along
and he knew he had to get out from behind those walls
because he'd been pretending
all along
to not be him

and he realized he had to be him
or it was all a huge joke
a waste of life
a waste of him

so he dug
and he pulled his pickaxepen
and he swung his pickaxepen
hard as he could
at those walls

it's hard
breaking down your walls
it takes courage
strength
perseverance
you want to quit
it hurts

but
he saw himself
coming out from behind the walls
and he knew he had to keep swinging that pickaxepen
or he'd remain stuck behind his walls

he had to get his self out
had to find his self
make his self him
or or it was all a huge joke
a waste of life
a waste of him

he had to be him
again
for his sake
for the sake of the others in his life
for Jesus' sake

selah ..~

some long time ago
when i started blogging
i blogged on journaling
   go here for that .. http://asthekingdomturns.blogspot.com/2013/01/trust-lord-with-all-your-heart.html

i am still of the mind
that when you force yourself
to talk to yourself
particularly in writing
you do yourself a favour
you learn who you are
if you're honest in the doing of it

when you do what my friend did
you look deep into yourself
and discover you
the real you
the you you sometimes pretend you're not
the you that hides under your bed
or in your bed

the you not many people know

the real you
the you in your heart
that needs to be who you are
   needs to be who you're comfortable with
   who you are free to be
without apology to anyone
   to any group
   to any career
   to any church
the real you that you need to be

or you fail
bigtime
as in massive

the world deserves you
you are of value to God only as you are you

if you play roles
and pretend to be some other you
you lose
you diss' God
'cause he made you in his image
if you hide that behind walls
bury you under walls
display another you to people
pretend
then you diss' the image of God in you

don't do that ...

find the real you
dig down deep
use a pickaxepen and break down your walls
and let you escape
into the open
for the whole world to see
for God's glory
in whose image you are

it's the only real way to be real

be real

be
you

for God's sake

in Jesus' name

peace to my friend

shalom to you

life 4 ..~ trekkin' out .. 9 .. lem and the homeless and Jesus and me ...

yesterday ..

had a meet with a very interesting person i'll call lem
i wanted to meet with him because he knows lotsof things santa cruz
he's older than i
wiser
and gets around to all the organizations trying to help people
he tries to keep up

i figure i'm new and lost and need info

lots of info
and lem is kinda like the butterfly
he's everywhere
and knows everyone
it seems

i don't remember much if i don't write it down
i noted some of what he said
but the dude threw out a massive amount of info

although my mind doesn't store detail
it sees things
recognizes things in people ...
i'll take the infirmity and keep the mindsight thank you
it serves me well

lem is a roman catholic
he involves himself in the church community we are in
he has a heart for the homeless
a wonderful memory
a welcoming home
a wonderfully flowery overgrown private backyard
and cashews and almonds and strawberries on the table in the 'drawing room'
and a cuppa tea ... earl grey

his front room is filled with books
mostly rc related
and pictures of all sorts
and there's a used fireplace
2 walking staffs in the corner behind the door

his wife is a painter
her passion exploded when she joined church

i spent 2+ hours with lem today
every minute tuned to his mind
listening to hear his wisdom

lem's very laid back
he doesn't offer much advice
and his thinkmode is freedom
freedom from the burden of the american dream
freedom from keepingupwiththejoneses
freedom from getting his value from his career

freedom for homeless people
freedom for hungry people
freedom for families with no roof
freedom for college students that sleep in cars

we discussed all kinds of things related to the homeless
he mentioned organization after organization
church after church
group after group
all doing their own little thing
in their own little way
to help here and there

great stuff

then he mentioned the recent UN survey on the homeless
conducted in santa cruz county every other year
this survey indicated an increase of 28%
from the 2,771 to 3,536
in 2 years ...
they're based on incomplete info anyway
and subject to reality
which usually means the info is 25-50% understated
at least if it's anything at all like the last county i lived in ...
homeless people run from censuring ... they are afraid of being harassed by the powersthatbe
and that not without cause

money still talks
bigtime
it rules the world
it rules this country
from the very top
literally

.... selah ..~

something became very clear to me as lem told his stuff
all those organizations
all those resources
all those people wanting to help
trying to help
in their own little way ...
piecemeal

the piecemeal hit me

what if they were to pool their resources
food and clothing and people and storage and distribution and ...
but then ...
bureaucracy
redtape
politics

ok
so it won't work ...
because everyone's scared there will be a rush
once everyone knows they have stuff
and then they won't have their stuff
to help their little group of needy ...
they want to control their stuff

so.......
let's take out the non-religious org's ...
that leaves the ... religious
the ones that should be wanting to help ...
isn't that why they're helping   ?
maybe if we get them together ....
but then
there's the bureaucracy redtape politics ...
sad that

issues -
some people get their worth from 'helping the poor'
so they want to be recognized for their role in helping the poor
so they need to be identified with their stuff and the poor they use it for ...
so they can feed their worth
clothe their worth

they want to control their resources
not pool them

i think i'm going to be sick ...

i began to emote ...

all i know is this
God called me here
to help the homeless ....
isn't that what it's about  ?
the homeless  ?
if the religious
   the ones that claim to be for god
   bear the godname
   be the godpeople in the earth

   speak in the name of god

   take tithes from people to run their godbusiness

can't reorient their thinking away from the me
and be what they're supposed to be
do what they're supposed to do ...
then
what makes them so different from everyone else  ?
what indeed ...
maybe a lot of fluff and colour and pomp and pride ...

selah ..~

i just got here
i'm a stranger
and there are other limitations to me in this place
but i think maybe
just maybe
that's a good thing
because i get to see it from the outside
i get to look fresh
with new eyes

and i promise
if i get the opportunity
again
or again too
i will speak out
like i did yesterday
in lem's drawing room
to 2
or 200

i will say
all i know is
God wants to help the hurting
and he asked me to help him help them
and it's really that simple
help ...
put aside the mestuff
the mychurchdoesthis stuff
and help
use everything
everyone
and help
now

help all
regardless
for God sends the rain on all
and the sun shines on all
regardless

i'm going to push what i see to be the core issue
i'm going to run right past the tape
step over the politics
walk around the mestuff and the mychurchdoesthis stuff
and go to the heart of the matter ...
people are hurting
they need food shelter clothing
and we have food shelter clothing
= problem solved
at least for today
today
don't concern yourself with tomorrow
sufficent for tomorrow is tomorrow's evil
do it today
now
for them
for God
diss the redtapeandthebureaucracyandthepolitics

help them
they hurt ...

and it is my sincere understanding of the God i serve
the Jesus i follow
that
he
hurts
with
them

he cries for them

and he looks on
head in hands
mind bewildered
at the people
   the ones that claim to be for god
   bear the godname
   be the godpeople in the earth

   speak in the name of god

   take tithes from people to run their godbusiness

and don't ...

Jesus weeps

mine

as his disciple

is to weep with him

and do his mind

shalom

lost and found and lost and found ...

i was lost
all my life

i thought i found me
once
and i followed a path i figured was me

and then
i didn't know i was lost
all my life

but i was lost

i had this stuff
in my head
i learned
and i thought i was right ...
and being right became my foundness
and i followed that path a long ways
over hill and dale
overseas ...
over people ...

but i was lost

and i thought i was found
i thought i was right
i thought most people were lost
but i was found ...

but i was lost

very very lost

but i thought i was found ...

then one day
i fell in a hole
a very deep hole with water in the bottom and mud all over
and i became wet and dirty
and i couldn't get dry
just wet

and lost
in a hole
a very deep hole

i kept my foundness with me
my rightness

i hung on to my rightness
but it was heavy
very heavy
it weighed me down
it kept me in the mud
it kept me wet and muddy

then one day
in my mudhole
i freaked my self out
and had this wild thought
this heretical idea ...
i drove it out
rapido ...
i'm not a heretic
i'm right !
i will not leave my rightness behind !

and i was wet
and dirty
and getting sick from the wetness and the muddy dirty dirt

and i knew i had to get out

i knew that all along
but the walls were muddy
and it was so far up to out
i thought i could never get out
i thought i would die in my wet muddy hole

and there was my right
how could i ever tote that
up and out ...
no way
i couldn't leave it
it was me
my right was me
it was who i was
i was defined by my right
i fought for my right
took on all and any comers
'cause my right was right
their right was wrong
and i was right
dead right ...

the thought kept coming back
again and again and again ...
time after time i bit down hard
forced it out
away !
get away !
i can't leave me behind ...
how could i leave my right ? ......

i lived in that hole a long time
atrophied
aged my self in my wetandmuddy hole
nearly died there

i finally knew
i knew
if i stayed in my hole i would die ...
and that thought kept coming
it barraged my mind
till it broke my will ...

and i started to climb
out
of my hole
the only way i knew how ...
i dropped my right
left it there in my wetandmuddy hole
and climbed
hand over hand
finding footholds and toeholds wherever i could

it was hard
i was weak
it was a deep darkandmuddy hole i was in

i stopped from time to time to catch my breath
and think of the heresy i'd done
leaving my right back there
at the bottom of my hole

but i was moving
up
i could see light
up
reflecting off the mud
in my wetandmuddy hole
so i kept going
drowning the thought of the thought of leaving my right
back there
deep in my wetandmuddy hole

i made it out eventually

a long arduous climb

out

up

barely made it

and i left my rightness behind

gradually i began to regain my strength

i began to live again ...

without my rightness i left behind in that very deep wetandmuddyhole

because it was a heavy burden

and i wouldn't have been able to get out with it

but i was out

and the burden of my rightness was gone

i began to realize

i was free

free ...

i began to live

free

free of my rightness burden

my mind changed

my heart changed

slowly mind you

but change it did

slowly

out

up

i found me

finally

i'm not lost

i'm found

i found me

after i left my foundness in that deepwetmuddyhole

my rightness

my burden

i'm alive today

living life

newlife

walking a newpath

free

without my burden

apart from my rightness

free

found

alive

shalom

peace and love ...

timeout for a blogpost from someone else

i don't remember ever being in a fight
as in ever

i remember one occasion where a student several years older than i
wanted me to use my money to buy him lunch
and to go buy it too
he twisted my arm progressively higher behind my back
but i persisted in telling him i couldn't do that
he made me cry
i was probably 11 or 12

there were one or two other ocaasions
sometimes by friends who wanted to push their weight around
and were in effect bullying me
but i didn't fight

maybe i was/am a coward
maybe ...

i remember teaching my son from young
never to fight
always walk away
look the person in the eye and walk
even if they punched you
look them in the eye and walk
every time

i wasn't ever taught that
maybe i learned it
from the peaceful nature of my dad ...

Jesus was one of the most powerful people that walked this earth
but he knew the power of power-control
and the value of love

the following post is from someone i've considered a mentor for some years now
unknown to him
it's written in response to a blog by mark driscoll

recommended

http://reknew.org/2013/10/responding-to-driscolls-is-god-a-pacifist-part-i/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=responding-to-driscolls-is-god-a-pacifist-part-i

lose it ...

i had a discussion this morning
a good friend
who cares immensely for me and my wellbeing
especially since i moved 2,000+ miles further away ...

the talk sparked an impassioned response from me
and it's worth mentioning here

context - this is a personal blog
the meaning of 'blog' entails personal
it's my stuff
out of my mind

it's not designed to teach
instruct
admonish ....
it's my stuff
and if anyone gets anything from me putting my stuff out there
then go with it

when i give my life to Jesus
i give my life to Jesus

it has taken a lifetime to figure out what that means in reality

my whole life
   it seems
has been pointing to this newlife
   here
   doing what i'm doing now
a 56 year long hike

point is
since i moved to this country several years ago
i have seen God work
over and over and over and over and ... over ...
in the things my life entails
especially the little things
   at least 'little' in the eyes of others
like barely having enough money for a cup of coffee
   a HUGE issue for me .. ha

or working a lawn maintenance job
   and it begins to drizzle
   = i would have to stop for rain
   come another day to finish
   = $ lost
and i ask my God to pause the rain long enough to finish the job
and he does
this has happened several times ...

or i have no work
and ask my God for help
and he has repeatedly made a way for me to earn a living
repeatedly

i have asked for car issues to be solved
and he solved them
on his own
several times

i have asked for a dog companion
and he gave me the best dogfriend ever ...
i have had many dogs in my life
most of them great animals
but this dude is the bomb

those are just a few things that come immediately to mind

so when my friend and i talked this morning
and the overwhelming concern and worry erupted from them
as it often does
about me being wise and using 'common sense'
   as it concerns my money and stuff
and about using my money and stuff to help others
   while (they think) putting my own welfare at risk  ...

i gradually became emotional as the conversation developed
... again

see
i got this thing ...
i'm worried about it
   when i think of what's (not) in my accounts ...
but in talking
i realize i'm not worried really
i simply need to remind my self
that
i
own
nothing

and too
i
have
no
rights

that's the point

i am here
in Jesus' name
to do God's bidding
in the power of God's Spirit
for the benefit of hurting people

period ...
end of story

selah ..~

i have no career
i currently have no paying job
i live with 2 people and 3 dogs in a camper

but that's ok

it really is
here's why
i am not responsible for my wellbeing ...
my God is
it is his problem
not mine
absolutely

i have a 'bad' heart
and 'require' aggressive treatment through statin drugs and severe diet restrictions ...
i quit the statins 1 1/2 years ago
and moderate my diet ...
i'm working on the exercise

he has looked after me all the years i've been in transition
and he has proved himself totally reliable
   incredibly trustworthy
   all the time
   every time

how then can i not trust him
stop trusting him   ?

i live for him
i live in him
i live out whatever life there is left in this flesh
for him
with him in mind

i see a man and his wife sitting on the sidewalk yesterday
asking for food
i feed them

a young guy
maybe 20
asks me for change
i empty my change pocket

how can i not   ? ?

that would be to punch my God in the face

after his protecting/providing all this way
after all he has done for me in Jesus
through Jesus
after Jesus went to the extent he did
to provide reconciliation
include me in it
after the abuse God suffered through Jesus
for us humans
for the sake of the very abusers
after all this

do i really count my money
mark off my rights
stand up for my self
defend my space
   my clothing
   my food
? ? ?

i have to trust my God
and that's what trust is all about
it's about giving up my ownership and my rights
and what-i-think-i-deserve
and simply trusting
him

faithing it

what is faith worth
when i grab on to stuff
tie it to my waist with a lockandchain
look a hungry man in the eye and tell him i have nothing
   when there's something in my pocket
see a cold woman hunkering down on the sidewalk
   and not give her my coat
whose coat is it   ?
whose change is it   ?
not
mine

i own nothing
i have no rights

all my ownership and rights
exist in the person of Messiah Jesus
my master

the upshot of all that i just said is this ...

if God is God
and the God i believe him to be
   the same God that created everything
   the same God that delivered israel from slavery
      and me from slavery
   the same God that incarnated
      that lived humanity
      that suffered
      that died
      that defeated death and raised himself out of death
      to defeat the powers over death
      and provide release for his human siblings
      provide life for them with him
         in his very presence
..... ... . .. .. ...  .... .

then how on earth
can i
not
trust
him

he is absolutely trustworthy

to worry about my life
is to diss his trust

i cannot
not
anymore

i'm in
full-bodied
heart
soul
mind
strength

i am in
all of me
every ounce of this 130 lbs

i'm in
for the journey
i'm in for the fight against the dark powers
i'm in for the abused
the homeless and hungry and destitute

i
am
in

get it   ?

do not worry for me
simply mention my name to my God when you think of me
and then walk on
praising him
adoring his goodness

flourishing in his love ...

do that

it's the only real way

Jesus said
" if you don't lose your life
for me
you can't be my disciple" ...

i'm trying to be his disciple
i'm trying to lose me

you   ?

shalom to you

life 4 ..~ trekkin' out .. 8

tonight was another slap in the face of my ingenuousness ...
i keep getting slapped
my fault really
how could i be so ...... unknowing  ?
have i been so lost all my life?

it was the 2nd time i ate with the homeless
who come to the church compound to eat and sleep on tuesdays
it's a rotation thing among several churches

i helped prep the meal
and then hung around by a wall
watching them being served
while 3 homeless people played guitars
and sang their hearts out
about jesus

later i got some food
and sat in the middle of a few older ladies
and listened

when i felt cool with it
i introduced myself

i listened

i watched

i ate

lee was there again

one guy told me to get blankets at the thrift store
$3 or $4

i noticed the lady across from me as she ate
she was neatly dressed
she had impeccable manners
behaved like she was from a high class background
and when she spoke i heard perfect english perfectly spoken
i'm thinking ... she's one of the helpers or something ..... ..
she was homeless

jennifer was there ...
we saw her downtown today
sitting on the sidewalk
with a sign
" if you're having a bad day
imagine yourself in my place ...
so smile " ....
there was a cup next to her with a few dollars ...
and she began to cry when we talked
said we wouldn't believe how she was treated today
people castigating her
calling her lazy
telling her to get a job
she's a bum
and on and on and on ..
today seems to have been particularly bad for that ...
but jennifer can't work
she has severe hip problems
....
jennifer is almost always smiling

there was this guy
sitting at one end of a table
a plate of food in from of him
fork in one hand
his head resting in the other hand
eyes closed ...
i saw him
i saw him again several minutes later
same exact position
   eyes still closed
   fork still poised
he remaind like that for over half an hour
we were clearing the stuff
cleaning up
i was washing dishes
i checked him again
still there
i sat across the table and tried to get his attention ...
absolutely no response ...
i became worried and spoke to 2 helpers
he is a meth/coke user ...
we were quite worried
one of the helpers walked over and took his hat off to see if he was alive
the man jumped clean off the chair and screamed
then he started crying
prostrate on the floor
face down
while several people looked on
scared and worried and wondering what to do
a homeless woman went gently to his side
knelt down and began gently rubbing his back
speaking softly ...
some were worried he might hurt her ...
eventually he looked up
" why am i on the floor ? "
the dude was sober and alert and clearheaded as a judge ...
one of the most radical things i've seen ...
she spoke softly to him
and said he apparently had a bad dream
he replied he had a dream about his ex ...
he realized there were people looking on
and apparently embarrassed he grabbed his stuff and quickly left
leaving his food ....

that soft-speaking woman was jennifer
.... .  ........ .. ... .

there were children there
15 14 12 10 years old.....
children
homeless

old ladies
homeless

i told jennifer later
my intention was to educate people about homelessness
get them to know that homeless people aren't necessarily
druggies or drunks or dropouts or lazy ...
she was all for it
thought it was a useless endeavour
noone will listen
but go for it !
then i asked her if she'd talk to me on tape ?
she is all in
said she's ready whenever

one of my friends left the room
crying
couldn't believe we were feeding hungry children

selah ..~

i was leaning against a wall
talking to the pastor
as we watched the 80 or so people getting their meals
i told him
i want to see us feeding 500 at a time ...
he looked incredulously at me
and said
" don 't scare me
i get the feeling you'll get what you're asking for ... "

i hope so

selah ..~

a friend blogged recently
that we might never see the fruits of what we're trying to do
kinda like the monarch butterflies
they die before they get to where they're migrating to ..
another generation gets there

that may be so for me
i'm cool with that
God helping me
i give whatever life there is left in me in the effort
no prob
none whatsoever

i mean that

i was destined for this

i just took so long
to get here .... .

so very long ......... . ... . . .. . . . .

shalom

life 4 ..~ trekkin' out .. 7 .... the Voice ..

sometimes it's good to look back
sometimes
just turn around and look
not for long ... don't want to stay there
but just long enough to remind yourself ...
where you came from
how the roads led to here ...
look once more at the main turns
the explosions that shot you out of one space into another
out of one life into a new life

it's good for the soul
wisening
a perspective thing to do
places you firmly in the now
locates you

selah ..~

my whole life
has been leading me to
here ...

selah ..~

i'm locating
myself
trying to anyway
it's exciting
it's filled with difference
variety
change
and that's ... interesting

there's also the strangeness
not merely of the place and the people
but the strangeness of me
here
in this new place
again ....

been there done that
several times now
it's unsettling
disturbing
upending ...

adrift
in newness

as an introverted romantic
it's difficult
the need now is to step out
find people
meet and talk and gettoknow ...
my privateness wants to follow someone else in
let the extrovert do the breakthrough
walk in on their heels
join in

but
methinks
i'm tired of waiting
i got to do this differently
this time

i'm tired of waiting
to gain a foothold
tired of bending myself to fit others' schedules
go when they go
sleep when they sleep ...
moving to the beat of their drum

i have to make my own way
find my own way in
my own way around
locate myself
rather than wait

it's tough

at my age
people are usually long settled
secure
grounded

it's a frightening thing sometimes
to know you're adrift
on a new sea
it can dislocate your mind
put it out of sync
as you frighten yourself into numbness
immobility
uselessness

selah ..~

that was perhaps a lengthy way of saying
major lifechange is scary
especially when you sell everything
lose everything that was oldlife
and step out into newlife
vastly different life
... and
at my age

there's another side to that coin ...

i don't walk alone

and i am constantly having to bang my head against the rock wall
remind me
i do not
walk
alone
never alone

fact is
i'm in this place
because of the one who walks with me
he put a black hole in my heart
a dark broad deep void
a space that has to be filled

i tried to fill it
college
career
family
church
..... fail
major fail

selah ..~

he called me
opportuned me
and i'm in
i'm here

i travelled a long bumpy dusty dark dangerous road
   to get here
and it took a lot out of me
a lot
i will not allow me
to diss that
i cannot

selah ..~

there's a voice
sings in the back of my head
sometimes i can't get the words
sometimes it's barely a whisper
   a distant melody
   hardly audible

but
know what   ?
i know that voice
it's a familiar voice
i'd know it anywhere
even when it's
inandout
   like a bad connection
fady
   like saythatagain
or
not there
   can't hear a thing .............. . ... ... .          .            .

thing is
i know
i know
the Voice
is there
i know

it may be silent
it may not have anything to say right now ...
it may be i'm not listening ... .. .
but it's there
that Voice

mine
is to listen
hear
follow
faithing
always faithing
always listening
following
always

there's nothing else
nothing worthwhile
nothing

my life
is his
my heart
is his
my name
is his

i follow
whereever
the Voice leads

i never walk alone
never

shalom to you
today

life 4 ..~ trekkin' out .. 6

yesterday was a refreshing day for me
i got to see God moving
in a small gathering
of church
his presence palatable
the group engaged in oneness
family

and that was my first time
churching with them

more comments in a previous post, here:
http://asthekingdomturns.blogspot.com/2013/10/life-4-trekkin-out-5.html
..........................................................................................................................

last night
i was privileged
again
to see the hand of God
working
in a different way
different context

we had the first core meeting
of what is to be
a movement to work with the homeless
varied
different
in many respects
   different backgrounds
   different religious affiliations
   different careers
just difference

       in tandem

one mindset
one broad vision
flowing into differing visionviews
differing i'd-like-to-see's
differing focuses

all pointing in one direction
all for the kingdom
all in Jesus' name

selah ..~

one thing stood out to me in particular
amid that energy
amid all that creativity in potential ...

i heard a pastor
humble

i was shocked
then enthralled
then moved

there's a need for that
in this world of the drive for recognition
this christianity of make-a-buck
of jump on every bandwagon out there
and ride it to the bank
of power
the right to wield control
the need for accolade
and finding worth in the adoration people offer ...

i was moved

and i thank God i was witness

....

remember Moses ...

go here for that:
http://asthekingdomturns.blogspot.com/2013/10/trekkin-into-kingdomness.html


shalom

trekkin into kingdomness ..

this hit me a couple times recently
it's pertinent
methinks
so it's shareable

one highly esteemed person among the people of israel
is moses
he's referred to as the lawgiver
God gave the commandments to them
by him
on the mountain
where he 'saw' YHWH

he was the one YHWH chose to lead enslaved israel
out of egypt
after 430 years
into the land he promised
abraham
and his seed

big dude
lots of credits to his name
worked huge miracles and signs

......

question
how'd he get there   ?
his journey ...

his life can reasonably be broken into 3 stages
about 40 years each
like so ...

stage 1 -
raised in egypt
in the palace of pharaoh himself
alongside the princes
in luxury
educated at the hands of the best
trained in the art of war
maybe that led to
   independence
   self-reliance
   arrogance   ?

stage 2 -
in the wilderness
barebones life
looking after sheep
feeding sheep
protecting sheep ........ . .. .. ... .
   shepherding was considered a contemptible occupation in egypt

huge lifeswing ...
from the lights and fame and honouramongmen
to the starlight and nobodyknowsme
   and trying to locate himself in the vastness of the universe
maybe that led to
   survival mode
   humility
   vulnerable

the life of the prince
morphs
into the life of the shepherd
from the heights
to the sorry side of the tracks

stage 3 -
back to egypt
out of egypt
back to wilderness
out of wilderness
into land of promise
leading
hundreds of thousands
guiding
protecting
moderating
adjudicating
managing

the strong hand of YHWH
in the land of oppression and abuse
overturning the powersthatbe
liberating the abused
making a home
for the homeless
in the land of promise

newlife
newhope
growth
flowering
verve

all of that utilized
all of those lifeexperiences
over 80 years
40 x 2

the madness
upturning
crises
funneled into YHWH movement
maturity into Godaction

....... .. ..... . . .... . . . . . .  . . . . . .. .... . ..

selah ..... . ... . .   ..~

life is a journey
and deserves the attention to the now
each stage
is important
to be lived
in fullness ...
not skipped
not jumped
not escaped
lived out
in hope
of what is to come

YHWH
my God
can use the life
my life
regardless of my positioning in life
if
i
let him

he wants to

his abba nature
longs for me
to relinquish my independence
my self reliance ...

to see me as mortal
subject to abuse and hurt and death
limited ...
to see him as
caring abba
loving abba
wise abba
to turn my outlook over to his outlook
and follow Jesus
   the trailblazer
in the pursuit of bringing Godkingdom
to hereandnow
to upturn this world system
   under the authority of the prince of darkness

to be used
   his servant
to help the burdened
the enslaved
the captive
out of captivity to the dark prince
into light
the kingdom of light

liberation
freedom

selah ..~

sometimes
life looks like
deprivation and depression and hopelessness

if i let God
he will morph it into
new hope
use it
in his kingdom

i want
to grow into that
be used
building kingdom
freeing people

in Jesus' name
for God's sake

you   ?