too far east ? ? ...

'too far east is west'
they say

happens all the time
we experience
or learn something by whatever means
and it's a negative thing
and we respond
away from that
towards the thing we think is true/positive ....

and we just keep swinging in that direction
we don't slow down
or stop
or come up for air
... inertia'ed

........................................................................................
... aside
privately please ...

i have this mantra
(oops... was i not supposed to use that word?
A statement that is frequently repeated; a characteristic formula or refrain
a dictionary def., fyi)

and it runs like
Clarify
Simplify
Balance
Centre

that sums up my view on life
lived for the kingdom
it involves
primarily
putting a bit
in  my own mouth
and teaching myself 
to die

i'm a stubborn one though
and i resist the bit
biting down hard
staring at me with angry eyes
for wanting to tame 
me

i won't give up
i'll simply mantra it
and even if it takes the rest of my life
i'll keep pushing there

end aside ................................................................................

so
we swing too far
in that anti-direction
and end up
... too far east ?

the reason i introduced
clarify simplify balance centre
is
well
there it is ...

balance is crucial
less i fall
off this tightrope

and it's the pre-requisite

no way to centre
unbalanced

....

i have this good friend
i struggle with
on issues
of the kingdom

and one of the critical issues
in my eyes
is the LGBT issue

it's 1 of those things
that bites
hard

in 1 of my former lives
my position was
fixed
concrete-ed
glued in place

then i died
and in my death throes
i decided
that in my next life
i was going to
start over
almost from 0

almost ....

so i've started over
and virtually everything
is up for grabs
and i'm sinking my teeth
into old bones
with a new vigour

and this issue is a biggy
for me

i get the part
that these are people
as in person-s
and that God loves them
as much as he does me

i get that
i amen that

and my responsibility to that person
is to love them
with Godlove
same as anybody

i get that

but ............. .. ... .

when it comes down to
real life
and i have to decide
if i side with gay marriage
(as an example)
or gay ordination
(as another)
....
well i'm not sure

not that anyone is perfect
there are porn addicts a plenty
who are ordained practicing ministers
(as an example)

but that's hidden
   for now

my concern is
the church's blessing
on the ordination
of an open gay/lesbian person

....

i'm not sure where i am on that
i know where i was
and i know where i lean
but i'm pondering

selah


and then i think
of
me

what makes
my
sins
impune
hidden or not

i'm simply concerned
with swinging too far east on this issue

my aim is centre
and centre = Jesus
i'd like my thinking on it
to be his
is all

shalom