i awoke this morning
to discover my blog was still here
google blog was to have died july 1
i had frantically tried to figure what to do
how to preserve my posts
move them to another home
selah ..!?.
selah ...~.
in the transition
i wondered ...
why am i so concerned
with my 'blog'
what if it dies
is lost
ends up somewhere in hyperspace
or a black hole
becomes part of a digital garbage dump
so what
selah ...
why stress over it
is it that my pride is under threat
why
will i lose a part of 'me'
will i be less of a person
why
am i building a reputation
a career
... my self ?
am i on a rampage
to deconstruct religious christianity
to reconstruct what
i
see as
the real christianity ?
who made me
architect
authority
artist
why
after all
am i so
anxious
selah ... ~ ~ ~
something else i woke up to ...
my dogfriend
messed on the carpet
not just messed
a messy mess ...
and while i processed that
over coffee and internet
steeling myself for the inevitable cleanup
he messed again ...
perhaps
i
need a cleansing
a cleanout
a purge
perhaps i've become
too big a 'me'
perhaps it really doesn't matter
what happens to the blog posts
and
my rants and ravings
defenses and diatribe
inked diarrhea
are my own invention
to vent
to dump
to think through
to reform
and they matter little
because they are me-focused
they matter to me
too much
lost words ...
lost to whom
i realize
i am in process
and the think i am in
is a me-thing
it speaks 'me'
it shouldn't speak 'you'
you are you
and i am me
you are on your
own
personal
journey
and me
should not ever look to override
you
only help
assist
enable
encourage
maybe
selah ..
you
and i
must walk
our own paths
and yet
walk together
hand in hand
into
through
the kingdom of God
for the kingdom
for the king
not for
me
or for
you
for him
from whom
to who
for whom
are all things
i want him
to run through me
through and through
in my blood
racing through me
bringing life
selah ~~~~~~~~ . ~
as i go
i might share some of that
because
you
may be going
and my share
may help
somehow
as i muse
may strike a chord in you
mix with your own music
help
somehow
i'm not here for me
or
for you
and yet
i am here
for me
maybe for you
in the end
i want to have been
here
for Him
and Him alone
and that should bring
us
together
the journey
the friendships
the 'battles'
the musings
the talks and conversations
arguments and disputations
...
all are
to be
for him
pushing his agenda
growing his kingdom
edifying
for him
selah .. ~
i am
comfortable
with
lost words
see you
again
maybe
somewhere
shalom
Wow to Mr. K...shocked,but he is only human, right?
ReplyDeleteI think you are self-reflective, and that is an asset. We all have to be careful not to make idols....of our pets, or friends, our pastors (or tv ones), our l
Blogs, our vehicles....the list is endless. Our minds must be trained to focus on God, and that starts with a personal relationship with Him...talking to Him all day when needed, no matter the cause. That will help keep us gronded. In what is important. As I start to purge my house of unnecessary things, I have begun to take that approach..is it really needed in the scheme of things? This reflection also keeps us humble. I think your blog is good because it helps those of us who read it to reflect on ourselves and perhaps grow. It isno different from a book study or Bible study where people are giving their opinions.