compassioning .... .

in a friendly discussion with a fellowdisciple who cares a bunch about the marginalized

the point was well-made that homeless people sometimes cause problems for the general public and for business houses

some can be boisterous and messy and inyourface ..
i stepped from there across the divide
and tried to walk into their space for a minute
   as ignorant as i am of their condition

thing is .. . .   .
when you have no place to call ' home '
when you have no privacy
when you never get to use your bathroom
   only public restrooms and sometimes the woods
when you have to truck everything you own around with you all the time
   which is basically whatever you can move with
   which = hardly anything you don't absolutely need
      no picture albums with family fotos
      no teddy bears from when you were 2
      nothing extraneous at all
when you have to look for space to sleep night after night after night
   and never ever know how safe you will be on any given night
when you're wet and cold and have no way to get dry
   sometimes for days
when you have to deal with traffic and water and getting splashed
when you walk into a place soaked from rain and have to endure all the glances and stares
when people are constantly judging you for your condition
   looking down their noses past their gold-framed specs and mascara
   as if you were some wet stray dog
when you have to ask for everything
   hand outstretched
   and then have to ask tomorrow again
   and the next day
   and the day after that
      feeling indebted to everone
when you never ever feel comfortable regardless of where you are
when you have to face cops and militant neighbourhood folk and protective business owners
and anywhere you are is not cool for somebody or the other
when your days run into one another
   and you walk for an hour to get to a soup kitchen for food
   and realize it's the wrong day for that ..
   now you have to get back
      find another source for a meal
when all about you is suspect
   all day
   every day   .  . . .      .       .

when you are the person noone wants to see or hear or be around
they just want you gone from there
gone from their space
... invisible

when that kinda stuff defines who you are

then
i can see how you get upset so easily
maybe have an overly defensive attitude
get easily offended, even when no offense was intended
fly-off at almost nothing ..

i get that
i get it

because i am not an animal
i am a human
and i deserve shelter
and i deserve food
and the privacy that accompanies toileting and showering

i deserve the basic life-rights of a human created in the image of God

.....  .. .  .    .

when daily life is spent on the edge
walking the fence line
   where 1 misstep left is wild dogs and 1 misstep right is animistic auhtority
when it seems the whole world
doesn't want me around ..

how can you not understand my constant tension
how can you not see my stress
how can you be so judgmental of my attitude
of my drinking
how can you be
so heartless ..

help
just take it on as a family matter
and look to help
with longsuffering
with patience
out of love
for Jesus
and
me

i am the you you fear ..

love me
help me
hear me
see me

give me space to be human
to feel human again


.... in Jesus' name

compassion .. ~

stepping out of my space

crossing over 

into your space

to be 

you