traces of pharissee ..

we never know
we may think we do 
but if it's not personal, we never know exactly what people are going through in their struggles
even if we know what they are facing
we don't/can't know the depth of it
because it's not happening to us
we're not in it

i'm not dealing with this issue
he is
she is

and i'm here making comments about it
talking about them
talking disparagingly
like "why are they doing that?"
or "why don't they do this?"
"can you believe they're ..." this or that
and am amazed that they're acting the way they do

i have my opinion on their problem

and i know what they should be doing
and they're fools for not doing it

when really i don't know what is in their head
when they go to bed at night
or how destructive that relationship is
the relationship they had banked on for the rest of their life
or how difficult it is for her to raise those children alone
or how they've been thinking about suicide ...
or tried it already

think about it ...
selah

who am i?
who am i to look across at them and pass my judgement?
who am i to even comment?
who am i to?

where do i get off being their judge?

i mean, people don't know what i'm going through
i wouldn't want them talking about it
about me
about what i should do or shouldn't
about what kind of a fool i am
to be dealing with things this way....'


i did an internet search; result follows:

This more recent study found that the original list of Holmes and Rahe to be relevant today for the most part but there were some noted differences. Here is the top ten list of life stressors as found by researcher Anne Spurgeon and colleagues:
1. Death of a spouse

2. Jail sentence

3. Death of immediate family member

4. Immediate family member commits suicide

5. Getting into debt beyond means of repayment

6. Period of homelessness

7. Immediate family member seriously ill

8. Unemployment (of head of household)

9. Divorce

10. Break up of family
( http://www.healthcentral.com/anxiety/c/157571/115211/life-predictors/ )

i did a mental tally of the family and friends i'm currently in communication with
and all rate in the top 10

some are in more than once
some several times

people don't deserve this
we are not made to handle these, except on rare occasions
they're the top 10, for goodness sake
all are in
now
at the same time

and i am to sit and judge their lives?
on what authority?
am i God?
because only he knows it all
even those closest to us don't know the depth of the issues we struggle under

i will not judge them
i have to stop

i will support them
i have to make that my goal ...
not condemn
come alongside
with a cup of coffee
a listening ear
a praying heart
acknowledging God in all of it
and refusing to rely on my understanding of the way things are
(prov 3. 5,6)

i have to

besides all that
the stinging fact is that i'm failing to acknowledge
that there are spiritual forces of evil
everywhere
and they are all bent on thwarting the will of God on Earth
and on destruction

Ephesians 6 tells me my enemy is not clothed in flesh and blood
our battle is not against flesh and blood,
but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the world powers of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavens

there's a principle i'm trying to ram into my brain
be quick to judge my self
but slow to judge another
regardless of the way things look

i am the log
they are the splinter

people hurting all around me
will i be the Accuser to them (the Satan)
or will i be Jesus to them

shalom