love wins, every time

I am concerned about the state of marriage. 

I have been for some time. And many others, including those in Christianity, have been for decades, and have taken various steps to remedy or at least stymie the dread downhill of it all. Applaudable, for there is hardly anything more significant to humanity than marriage and the family that erupts thereby.

In fact, I figure God generously gave us that unique relationship to teach us love in all its fleshed-outness. That way, we get a first-hand, lived-out understanding of what He wants our spiritual relationship with Him to be like.

That’s just my take on it. But just suppose I’m in the ballpark on that …

My concern in this blog entry is this: the ‘church’ has contributed to a drastic misunderstanding as to lovers’ love.

The greatest commandment is this: to love the Lord God with all of my heart, mind, strength … all of my being. And the second is just like it: to love my neighbour as my self. Note: it doesn’t say to love my neighbour as I love God. Important distinction, in my mind. It’s important because it’s not the same kind of love.

That’s where we’ve detoured in our theology. It’s not the same kind of love. To love a lover is a totally unique love. It’s not the same as the love I have for my dad or mum, for my son or daughter, for my neighbour. It’s a unique love, meant for one person only.

I hear ‘love’ being leveled across the board for any and everyone, as if it’s all the same love. It isn’t.

God wrote about it too. He inScripturated this lovers’ love. Check out Song of Songs. And what an apt name! The Song of songs. Kind-of-like Lord of lords, or King of kings. This love stands out, stands apart, reeks of total unity and of melting into oneness, of longing for togetherness.

Somehow I don’t hear much preaching/teaching on SofS. Very little. Go there. Read there. Ponder there, and consider that kind of love. Where do we see it? Did God make a mistake to have SofS written, and to preserve it for us? Is there a deeper meaning to the book? Should we ‘spiritualize” it, treat it as if it’s a symbolic of our love-relationship with Jesus, as many have done (and there’s good reason for doing that, as I said earlier)? (I believe the illustrious Augustine of Hippo is the main culprit, again.) Methinks the main point of the book is to illustrate the reality of the love God intended for lovers, and through that to point us to love for Him. Anything short of that is to miss the mark. That’s the bullseye right there. Go there. Understand there. 

Then, when you look for love in this life, look for this kind of love. When you think of marriage, a lifetime dedicated to loving a particular person, think Song of Songs. You’ll be on the right road.

If we would teach this, talk about it, counsel young marry-would-be's, we would be doing God justice in the matter, and saving a lot of people from a lot of hell. Really. 'Cause there's hardly hell-on-Earth like a messy, abusive, destructive marriage. It speaks to everything God is against. And it teaches the next generation to be abusive and un-loving.

If you don’t have this as you’re walking into marriage, forget it; you're missing the most significant ingredient of all. 

I’m blogging, I suppose, to Christians mainly, and so I take it for granted that the context of my comments is seen as God. I refer you to holy Scripture, SofS. I couch my thoughts in the person of God. This God is the author of that kind of love. You go to him for it. You refer to his wisdom when you look to marry, not your own. And you depend solely on him for this love as you walk life’s trail with your love-er, reflecting Jesus.

shalom